Well, after reading my friend blogs, I have asked myself. What does marriage mean to me?
I have been in marriage for like 4 months, to me marriage still a bit not clear to me. Marriage is like a phone call to me in the night, while I am sleeping..... and woke up sleepy and answer,~ "who the hack are you?"... not sure if anyone understand the way I am trying to put it.
I am still amazed I am married......and wonder why I am married.
Why do I marry?
To share my feeling with my wife? .....fuck no~
First thing I learn about woman is : "you never tell them how you feel to their face right away".
if she asked, how is my dress today? you can't say I don't like the dress right away. I have learned to say~ the words like "maybe", "perhaps" . Such as, this one is ok~ but MAYBE you want to try that one on as well...or perhaps you should try something that match your shoes?
To live with a creature that shout at me first, and later become gentle and soft ~? Yup, that is the woman I know~and love. There are many reasons why I don't like to get marry.....but I find a reason for all of them.
Number 1: According to a solid research finding~ (yes research is in my gene) a woman will gain up to 6 kilograms if she had a partner but no baby in the first 10 years of marriage.....and yes Maggie have gain some weights after our wedding, but I think I can live up with extra 6 kg on her, which she have not reach the 6 kg limit~ if she did, I shall start a new research.
Number 2 : Marriage is the end of options, end of game..... yes with marriage, I lose my right to many things that was the right thing to do while I am single. But I guess I can live with just one woman, I did the math right this time. If one woman already give me so much headache and painful life sometime, imagine what would 2 woman or 3 woman could have done to me.....
Number 3: Marriage is a constant compromise...Yes, the choice of freedom is gone, now "WE" will decide what to do over the weekend and where to live, what to buy for dinner~ etc. Yes, I do want to experience everything (all the right thing only) before the long dirt nap~But it wouldn't be fun if I experience it along, who to share with?
Number 4: Marriage is FOREVER!!!! God, this scares me the most. It is not like TV shows when you want to shut it down or switch channels, you just click the freaking remote control....... Still, I have not find my remote control and I have not found a reason to switch channels or shut it down yet....I am still trying to find a reason for this one....
On the night before I got marry, my father tell me this. (Maggie can prove this did happened...)
My son, there are 2 rules you need to know about marriage.
Rule # 1. Wife is always right. Rule # 2. If you think your wife is wrong, go back to rule number 1.
I didn't quite agree with that till recently...after the fight.... I came to an understanding that in our marriage there are 2 sides...one who is always right, and the other one......the husband.
So, if I am not here to share all my feeling to my wife, why do I bother to marry her?
I guess my best answer will be "I kind of grow on her at first, and now I am stuck with her" and yes~ I love her as well with all my heart. If you love it all, there shouldn't be nothing wrong "living" with it.~
Sunday, 9 October 2011
Wednesday, 5 October 2011
Interview with Mike~
Well, meeting this "Mr. Mike" was not so hard. He arrived there like 12:00PM and text me, "I am just parking my car", and our meeting is suppose be at 1:00PM......I text back, " I will be there in several min" after that full speed on my scooter.
He is very easy going and younger than I thought around 30+ max 35 already a company director (something is wrong about this world or he is another outcome man) , and we talked a lots, I have learned something new about New Zealand.
First thing....in New Zealand resume is suppose be 3 pages to 5 pages. That is shocking news to me, I have tried so hard to keep the resume in 1 page. Cuz from what I learned and know, it is better to be as short as possible. If I knew this, I would have made 5 pages resume, I didn't know people like to read so much here. (not sure why he talked about my resume and give me some advises to improve it in term of Kiwi ways , either he like me a lot or he think I suck to the bone.....can't even write a good resume....sgin~)
2nd thing I learned is, maybe the name "Ta Ko" is not the best idea to use, he said Roger Ko sound better to him. I am not sure about this name things, I am proud to be call TAKO, because my parent name me that way. However, his reasons is that although Kiwi people are not racist and New Zealand do have very high percentage of foreigner as well. However, there are some cases people do tend to choose you because of your name. (I was thinking I should change my English's name into Jesus, that way people have good reason to worship me)
We talked a lots about possible development as Researcher. We also spend like 5 mins to talk about Teakwondo ( not sure why is this related but he is asking about it). He just dig into it...till he realize we talked too much about it.
During the talking, he have yawn about 6+ times, I panic a bit and thinking : Am I that bad?.... finally he apologize that it is because his 2 years son punched and waked him up yesterday around 2 AM, and after that he didn't get a good sleep.
I could have prepare more for this interview , but there are 2 questions that I was not ready for...well, maybe only one. The 1st question " what are your strength?" Yes very common question during interview, and I have prepared for it. I said " bla bla bla~ and bla bla bla plz worship me" (that is not really what I said) right after I answer the question, he asked again, anything else? ....I was that o~k~ if that is not enough I have "bla ~bla ~bla~ and bla bla bla~ I am God and you want to hire me" (again that is not what I said, but maybe how I appear to be). Than,....he asked the same thing again....I want blank in my mind for like 2 secs (that is not good), and answered, "well, I am a funny guy~ and I am not sure if that is a strength", and we both laugh about it. Honestly, I think he is pulling some tricks on me or just finish watched "due where is my car" movie......anyway~ he have stop asking my strength
"What is your dream job"? he asked....I didn't prepare for this one, first thing in my head is " My dream job will be owning the company that print money and I can print money for free" but I answered " My dream job is doing what I love to do, such as helping people, contribute so society, bla bla bla~ (and add) of course, a good salary level as well." not sure if this one went well~ XD
He took note of what I said during the whole section, and he have Roland's hand writing. It require me to have extra wisdom to read them....so I am not sure what he wrote about me.
In the end, he said he will need to talk to some one in charge of HR. And if HR dept. approved, we will meet again. How long will that take? I asked, he said he is not sure, but he add on this " if I recommend you, your chances are high." (I fly to heaven for while after hear that till I realize, wait~ he didn't said he will, he said "IF") than I have my WTF moment for several sec.
The whole thing started around 12:30PM ended at 1:34 PM so there is a good 1 hour talking. We shake hands, and smile. He leaves~ I called Wife to tell her about it. The end. Now pray for me, that I got the 3rd one. cuz my name is Jesus from now on~
He is very easy going and younger than I thought around 30+ max 35 already a company director (something is wrong about this world or he is another outcome man) , and we talked a lots, I have learned something new about New Zealand.
First thing....in New Zealand resume is suppose be 3 pages to 5 pages. That is shocking news to me, I have tried so hard to keep the resume in 1 page. Cuz from what I learned and know, it is better to be as short as possible. If I knew this, I would have made 5 pages resume, I didn't know people like to read so much here. (not sure why he talked about my resume and give me some advises to improve it in term of Kiwi ways , either he like me a lot or he think I suck to the bone.....can't even write a good resume....sgin~)
2nd thing I learned is, maybe the name "Ta Ko" is not the best idea to use, he said Roger Ko sound better to him. I am not sure about this name things, I am proud to be call TAKO, because my parent name me that way. However, his reasons is that although Kiwi people are not racist and New Zealand do have very high percentage of foreigner as well. However, there are some cases people do tend to choose you because of your name. (I was thinking I should change my English's name into Jesus, that way people have good reason to worship me)
We talked a lots about possible development as Researcher. We also spend like 5 mins to talk about Teakwondo ( not sure why is this related but he is asking about it). He just dig into it...till he realize we talked too much about it.
During the talking, he have yawn about 6+ times, I panic a bit and thinking : Am I that bad?.... finally he apologize that it is because his 2 years son punched and waked him up yesterday around 2 AM, and after that he didn't get a good sleep.
I could have prepare more for this interview , but there are 2 questions that I was not ready for...well, maybe only one. The 1st question " what are your strength?" Yes very common question during interview, and I have prepared for it. I said " bla bla bla~ and bla bla bla plz worship me" (that is not really what I said) right after I answer the question, he asked again, anything else? ....I was that o~k~ if that is not enough I have "bla ~bla ~bla~ and bla bla bla~ I am God and you want to hire me" (again that is not what I said, but maybe how I appear to be). Than,....he asked the same thing again....I want blank in my mind for like 2 secs (that is not good), and answered, "well, I am a funny guy~ and I am not sure if that is a strength", and we both laugh about it. Honestly, I think he is pulling some tricks on me or just finish watched "due where is my car" movie......anyway~ he have stop asking my strength
"What is your dream job"? he asked....I didn't prepare for this one, first thing in my head is " My dream job will be owning the company that print money and I can print money for free" but I answered " My dream job is doing what I love to do, such as helping people, contribute so society, bla bla bla~ (and add) of course, a good salary level as well." not sure if this one went well~ XD
He took note of what I said during the whole section, and he have Roland's hand writing. It require me to have extra wisdom to read them....so I am not sure what he wrote about me.
In the end, he said he will need to talk to some one in charge of HR. And if HR dept. approved, we will meet again. How long will that take? I asked, he said he is not sure, but he add on this " if I recommend you, your chances are high." (I fly to heaven for while after hear that till I realize, wait~ he didn't said he will, he said "IF") than I have my WTF moment for several sec.
The whole thing started around 12:30PM ended at 1:34 PM so there is a good 1 hour talking. We shake hands, and smile. He leaves~ I called Wife to tell her about it. The end. Now pray for me, that I got the 3rd one. cuz my name is Jesus from now on~
Tuesday, 4 October 2011
Taiwan Wedding video~
Taiwan wedding slides shows
This is made by my mom~ it may not be perfect, but it still warm me up ^^
This is made by my mom~ it may not be perfect, but it still warm me up ^^
Monday, 3 October 2011
Bad day
Today, we have our first fight after married (little one that was over in 2 hrs don’t count)
I was surprised that we got into arguments for such small matter………..
The arguments focus on “If our parents loan us some money should we pay back in future?”
To me, both our parents “spend” tons of money to make who we are today. As a full grown adult, we should be able to take care ourselves; if we make parents worry about us is already wrong. It is the idea seeing them as ATM machine which I can’t get over.
I am not saying I don’t need help from them. Of course I needed to ask them money for our wedding, and in future I might also need their help in finance. But what we have taken from them is not only in finance, also learn from their experiences, share their wisdoms and so on.
The idea I am driving at is, it isn’t wrong to ask for help. Regardless they help me or not, I believe they still love me, as I love them. It is my duty to repay the debt, that I own them as much as I can in my life time.
My wife seems to misunderstand me long time ago, whenever I said “repaid our dept” to our parents mean money. If money is the only way to repaid them, then I think I will never be able to do so. But, to add on to that, if I am ever rich enough to pay back the money they loan me, I would!!! And paid back more!! There is no end how much I own to them, and how grateful I am to them.
If I am rich enough, I will love to take both of my parents (wife’s side as well) to travel around the world. Or take them out for nice meals, or simply said I love you, whatever will make them happy is my way to pay my dept to them.
Anyway, since we both still in cold war, although I am not as piss off as I was (I believe it is a misunderstood). In my wife’s eyes, I am forever an idiot when it comes to money issues, or application form related…. which I do admit she is better in those things.
I have officially “loan” money from my wife to live (house rent, food (yes, I eat a lot), cell phone bills etc) about a month. Being jobless is pain in the ass, and it is getting stressful. I hate to take money from my wife, as much as I hate being jobless. I wish I could shut myself off, and only wake up when interviews come. Sometimes, we can joke about how much I have own her and how should I repay my depts. Although I can clearly sense that “Loaning” me money is making her stress too. If today, I was in her shoes and she is jobless, I will be happy to “loan” her my money as well.
However, this life style is making both of us very stress. One of my friend said, isn’t marriage suppose be supporting each other? Yes, I agree. I still remember I said something like “I, Roger, take you, Maggie, to be my wedded wife. With deepest joy I receive you into my life…..rest forgot XD , but there is something like for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health….bla bla bla~.
Indeed!!! Somehow me being jobless still making our marriage stressful, does the stress come from our parents? Friends?....no matter what is causing us being stress, I just hope this hell end as soon as possible.
About my job? The good news is I got 2nd interview this coming Thursday with their Director 1 on 1, please pray for me. Funny thing about my phone interview earlier, the guy who interviewed me have a strong Scotland or some English accent, when he said the meeting address for next interview I almost freak out……what I wrote down was “2H5 Halston Bee Road” at Esalta Coffee (that was after he repeat twice already)…….after I hang up , I tried to Google map it…..no such address exist, I had panic attack for like over 1 hour searching through yellow pages, Google, and all possible solutions. STILL, I can’t find the God dam place. I was like oh, I am so fuck~ and with little hope that he won’t think I am an idiot, I wrote to him an e-mail to ask the address….good thing is he did get back to me and said the address is “Salta Cafe, 285 Ponsonby Rd” , and hopefully he still like me enough….XD. I am going to quote from Roland, “being on time is not on time” cus people could be ready for you already. I will be there like an hour early…….make that 2 hours
Keep me in your prayer~
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